Utterly Horrendous

Top 10 girls… a little better this time around…

Posted in Uncategorized by thedavidlewexperience on March 4, 2010

Once again, the girls are upon us. And once again, the accessories section of Urban Outfitters appears to have vomited all over most of them. Have any of of them heard of “less is more”?

Kara needs to stop trying to be Paula redux. The loopiness and the hanging all over Simon deal. It’s just not happening, sweetcheeks.

CRYSTAL BOWERSOX IS BACK! Good news all around, considering she’s one of the best Idol has this season, guy OR girl. It would have been a damn shame if she got DQed for being ill. But nope – she’s well and ready to go.
Crystal starts us off… Crystal has a twin brother. That’s kinda cool. And she shows off her accessories as something meaningful, not so much as stuff she piled on to look trendy. Creedance Clearwater Revival is such a good artist choice for her, I think.
She just keeps getting better and better, doesn’t she? This may not be the most well-known Creedance Clearwater song [“Long As I Can See The Light”], but with the way she nailed it, who cares? Her voice is tinged with Jack Daniels and a life of living rough, and she’s completely got that “pure, raw natural talent” that Ellen said she had. What a way to start the night off… she set the bar REALLY high.
And for Simon to say he misunderestimated her last week… good news.

Haeley Vaughn makes and collects hair accessories… based on the amount she’s piled on tonight and last week, I’m not surprised. And I see she got herself a nice weave for tonight, which is somehow less flattering then before. AND she’s singing a Miley Cyrus song… pretty soon here I’m gonna need an insulin shot. No, Ryan, singing “The Climb” is not showing off your “serious” side.
This just in: It is possible to sing worse than Miley Cyrus on her own songs. It appears I completely overestimated young Haeley’s talent last week, because now that she doesn’t have an upbeat, quirky song to hide behind, she sounds… well, she just sounds awful. Plus I’m having a REAL hard time taking her seriously with all these pieces of junk jewelry… can you tell I find it all REALLY distracting??
Kara, I don’t know who the hell is rooting for Haeley… except maybe the people at Vote For The Worst.

Lacey Brown, our token quirky indie pink-haired hipster, likes antique shopping. She needs to move to San Francisco because she’d fit in with all 10,000 chicks JUST LIKE HER in that city. I’m sort of bored already.
She’s singing “Kiss Me” by Sixpence None The Richer, a one-hit-wonder song that was HUGE about ten years ago when I was still in high school and “Dawson’s Creek” was the most popular show on TV. This song is a much better fit for her voice, because she sounds exactly like the lead singer, but she’s still not that great, and I remain completely bored.
Randy whines [yes, whines] about how it sounds like karaoke… yeah, I agree.

Katie Stevens can say “Give me a kiss” in six different languages… I can say it in three! [English, Spanish and Polish] Languages are fun. She’s gonna sing something “young” tonight after singing “Feeling Good” last week… so she’s singing “Put Your Records On” by Corinne Bailey Rae, which has become SO outdone on Idol [and never really done well, either].
She’s okay, but not amazing. It really doesn’t seem like the judges are pimping her up as much as I’d expected, and it’s a good thing. I don’t think this was the right choice for her at all; it’s not a song that’s a vocal showcase and it’s such a jump from what she’s done on the show so far, but she needs to find a contemporary song that shows her talent. This wasn’t it.

Didi Benami reminds me a lot of Brooke White. They both have that same au naturel toothy blonde look, and both seem more than a little loopy. Right before she said she “meowed” before going on stage I was gonna say she was a few steps away from sounding like a crazy cat lady… so… yeah.
This week she’s singing “Lean On Me” by Bill Withers, which is a big jump from the adorable Ingrid Michaelson song she did well on last week. She sounds really good, but I’m not feeling her white-girl dance moves. Someone needs to tell her it’s entirely possible to stand still and sing. The tempo was also a little slow, but I don’t think that’s her fault. She’s got a great voice – but this isn’t a good song choice for her. Simon calls it “generic”. I kind of agree.

Michelle Delamor was pretty generic last week… and this week is singing “With Arms Wide Open” by Creed. WTF? This is either gonna be strangely amazing or a HOT mess, because anything Creed post-“My Own Prison” album is just terrible.
Once again, I get NOTHING from this chick. She has a good voice and she’s beautiful but she doesn’t seem to have ANY musical identity. Not to mention she’s biffing notes left and rights here in what seems like attempts to riff. It’s just not a good song choice – it dragged on and on and it’s just… not a good song. For anyone, really. I do love what she’s wearing, though [apparently it’s a Vera Wang. Nice].
The judges [sans Randy] loved it. They must really be pushing for the diversity quota here, with Todrick, Jermaine and Haeley all choking [and Ashley and Jose getting voted off last week].

Lilly Scott plays all kinds of instruments, and tonight is playing a 12-string during her performance of “A Change is Gonna Come” by Sam Cooke. Adam Lambert did this one good last season, so the bar’s set pretty high.
Lilly has a quirky voice, nothing like the bombastic Idols before her who’ve tried this one. Somehow, though, it works for her. She kinda reminds me of Cyndi Lauper, in her stylings and phrasing. I think she did this well, even though it was such a diversion from other versions.

Katelyn Epperly, thank heavens, has toned down her “little girl playing dress-up” look from last week and is wearing a gorgeous white-and-champagne dress. She was studying to be a recording engineer before Idol, which is kinda cool considering it directly relates to what she’s doing here. Has anyone on here sang a Coldplay song before? This is a good one.
She’s playing the piano on “The Scientist”, one of Coldplay’s most gorgeous piano ballads, and she sounds amazing. There’s no Bandzilla backing her up – just the piano she’s playing [and maybe a triangle chime here and there]. Love love love it. Beautiful. This is such a wonderful song for her voice.

Paige Miles likes to color with markers and crayons… which is AWESOME. After years of teaching preschool part-time and babysitting, I’m so inclined to agree. I like this girl’s personality – she’s got spunk.
Singing “Walk Away” by Kelly Clarkson… which really isn’t one of her best songs, but oh well. She’s doing it well though – her voice reminds me a lot of Kelly’s voice – although maybe not as strong. Great song for her voice though; her attitude is shining right through. That high note though… no.
The judges said she didn’t choose the right song. I can’t say I agree – I just get the feeling they want to stick her in the “diva” box.

Siobhan Magnus is one of those performers who I usually can’t wait to see what she does next. After doing “Wicked Game” so well last week, I’m not too excited to hear her do “Think” by Aretha Franklin this week. It’s not in her wheelhouse at all, and although she has the voice for it, there are notes she’s not getting – except that last high one. Well played! I still love her though. She’s safe.

This was a better night for the girls, and a better week all around for everyone.

Top 2:

Crystal Bowersox

Katelyn Epperly

Bottom 2:

Haeley Vaughn

Lacey Brown

In danger:

Lacey Brown

Didi Benami

See ya tomorrow for the results!

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