Venting about Season 9 and Top 12!

"Top" 12 or Last 12 Left?

David Here! We dropped the ball the last week of the semi’s and didn’t post recaps or opinion columns!! As some of you know, aside from being too into American Idol, I’m a full time stand up comic. In the last few weeks I’ve been in Seattle, LA, San Francisco and Sacramento. So the only parts of Idol I’ve seen have been on Youtube. It does suck not being able to sit down and watch the episodes in their entirety; but when the alternative is performing and being on stage, I gotta pick performing!

Also, this season has been delivering serving after serving of letdown sauce! Andrew Garcia is the guy I’m rooting for week in and week out, but he has been stagnant. Don’t get me wrong, I still enjoyed his rendition of Sugar We’re Going Down and I thought the judges were a little too harsh on him. I also think that Genie In a Bottle wasn’t bad either. I’m not sure what the judges are looking for, except they really loved Straight Up! I mean Straight Up was epic, so would it be out of line for him to do it again if the theme allowed it?? Andrew needs to have a “Billie Jean” moment soon or his days are numbered.

Also I was very disappointed in the Top 12 in general. This probably the most bland Idols Top 12 has been since I’ve been watching (which is Season 4). Can anyone name the Top 12 in its entirety without referring to a web site or rewinding the DVR? Maybe? You’d probably forget Katie Stevens or Lacey Brown or Paige Miles (before she let her love of MJ loose last week) This and Season 6 are the seasons where there haven’t been too many star-making “moments”, just performances. Don’t get me wrong, I still love Jordin and Blake Lewis from Season 6 but the lower half of that season was average at best (except for Brandon Rogers! I still wish he got the words right! He should have been Top 5 easily)

Maybe we’ve been spoiled the last two years with great talents: Adam Lambert, David Cook, Kris Allen, Jason Castro, Syesha, Allison Iraheta, Danny Gokey,  Matt Giraud, David Archuleta…

Even though this argument has some holes in it. Yes, you can’t really compare this Top 12 yet to previous years since we haven’t seen their full growth yet. David Cook was just coming into his own Season 7 with his rendition of Hello put him on the Idol map. Matt Giraud was eliminated then brought back last year with their “Why did they get rid of it” Wild Card round. So this Top 12 can’t really be judged until we can actually reflect on the growth of individual contestants once the competition is done.

But I can tell you so far (except for Crystal Bowersox who I can see struggling with some future themes and Andrew in dire need of a “moment”) any of the previous seasons contestants would own and win this years Idol without breaking a sweat.

So the gauntlet has been set for this years Idols! Lacey Brown was the first victim of the Big Stage and its now down to 11! You make it through this elimination you get to Tour with the Idols! So this is a pivotal week, make it count!

DAVID OUT!

First Week Auditions Wrap-Up. Top 5/Bottom 5

David Lew here giving you my wrap up for the first week of auditions. Contrary to popular opinion, the auditions are my least favorite part of the show. ACTUALLY, the group numbers later in the competition bug me the most.

Overall I thought this was a great week of auditions in Boston and Atlanta. They definitely showed more good auditions than they have before. I love the finding of diamonds in the ruff, not so much the ruff rocks they find everywhere.

Victoria Beckham was the first of the guest judges. She looked like a brown version of the Na’vi the first day. 2nd day she looked better. But her overall judging was minimal at best. Her banter with Kara was kind of fun. The second guest judge was Mary J. Blige, who was leaps and bounds better. She was more outspoken and more enthusiastic when she liked an audition. But they both pale in comparison to how I think Ellen will do on the judges panel come Hollywood week!

So I’m starting my weekly Top 5/Bottom 5 for the auditions. Maybe this will keep going into the competition. Until of course we get to the top 9. lol.

TOP 5

5. Ashley Rodriguez- This girl is very very good… looking. AND also a great singer. She sang the often sung Alicia Keys “If I Ain’t Got You” She reminds me of a thinner (yet equally beautiful) Jordin Sparks. I think she will be at least in the top 12. Unless something weird happens in Hollywood.

4. Keia Johnson- “What great hair you have” is what the big bad wolf would say. haha. This girl took a stale, played out “My Heart Will Go On and made it her own. I actually wouldn’t mind hearing this later on in the season.

3. Noel Reese- This girl only got a few seconds of air time, but this 16 year old can sing!! AND she sang a Whitney Houston song… so I can’t wait to see what she can pull out in Hollywood!

2. Miriam Lemnouni- What a beautiful beautiful girl! And her voice is really good. And I also love the eyes! The kid has great eyes, what can I say? She sang The Climb by Miley Cyrus (which got some air time since this years X Factor winner released that as the UK Holiday single). Lets hope she makes it out of Hollywood Week.

1. Jermaine Sellers- WOW! WOW! This was my favorite audition (besides the obvious, you’ll see when you scroll down further). This guy has top 5 written all over him. He has got the voice, he’s young and has a marketable look. If he can show some versatility during country or broadway weeks where his voice may not be the best suited for those theme weeks.  But other than that, he is definitely the early front runner to win the whole thing.

Bottom 5

5. The “I will always love you” girl- Best quote of the night came from her. Kara asked “Do your friends tell you that you can sing.” To which she replies “Not really. But I don’t let that discourage me.” Maybe she should just take note.

4. Andrew Fenlon- Douchy Clark Kent. But I agree with Steph that he was definitely (like most) was steppin’ up his douchy levels for the camera.

3. Mere Boyle- Anime girl… Not the WORST voice, but she gets on the list for absurdity and also for the one of the most dramatic reactions of the week.

2. Janet McNamara- 1st audition of the season. Steph had it right as describing her as Charlize Theron in Monster. The fact that she got her confidence to audition from playing the American Idol game on Wii on top of the over the topics antics, was a perfect recipe for disaster.

1. Skiibo Ski- I don’t know where to put this kid. He DID go through, but seriously? Is he really going to make it out of Hollywood no. He gets on this list for the misspelling alone!

NUMBER 1 AUDITION OF THE WEEK:

PANTS ON THE GROUND!!!!

(Was there any doubt????)

Lookin' like a fool with your....

This guy will be at the finale with Flo Rida and it will be epic!!! We love this guy!!  And also check out the remix!

And now check out Jimmy Fallon doing an amazing Neil Young impression singing Pants on the Ground.

TIL NEXT TIME AMERICA!

-DL-

Rat Pack Top 5 Episode. Recap and MORE!

It’s Official:

Adam Lambert WILL be our new Idol.

It is now a race for 2nd Place.

Our New Idol. Mark my words. For better or worse

After watching Adams performance of “Feelin’ Good” it is very apparent that he is poised to be our next American Idol. Everyone else in the competition is there for the sake of earning the DeGarmo spot.

The episode was pretty good overall. Nobody phoned in their performances.

Can you guess who the mentor was this week!?

HINT: He was NOT in the Rat Pack.

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..

…

….

YOU GUESSED IT: JAMIE FOXX!

Mr. RAY himself

If my memory serves me, Jamie is probably the biggest star they’ve had in a long time. Also, he is a star that is still in his prime. We are usually privy to the Dolly Partons, Neil Diamonds, Andrew Lloyd Webbers… All stars in their own right, but Jamie Foxx is an A-List star NOW. So that’s a pretty big deal.

Jamie was a cool mentor with plenty of advice, and it also helped he was hilarious in the process. I wonder if this mentor gig was purposefully aligned with the release of his latest film The Soloist (which didn’t do very well in its first weekend, but maybe this will give it a nice boost).

Let me get this off my chest. The judges are more annoying than ever with some of the comments they are dropping. I understand that this is a singing competition. HOWEVER, a viable compliment from Randy Jackson can longer be (and this is a direct quote from his judging of Danny Gokey tonight:

“This is a singing competition, and you can SING!” (Insert crowd screaming trying to match Randys energy)

Another direct quote from Randy Jackson:

“You come out lookin’ like Brittany Murphy (*Random*). Lookin’ Dope. You sing like Pink, but with, like, 10,000 more octaves. That right there (arms flayling), yo, yo, yo (arms still flayling).”

Oh, Randy.

YO! This is a hot one AMERICAAAAAA!

I mean, we started out with 100,000 strong auditioning. We are down to the Top 5. I THINK it’s obvious that they can sing. What a dumb thing to yell. It’s like yelling at a NY Yankee “DUDE YOU CAN REALLY SWING A BAT!”

AND NOW FOR THE PERFORMANCES:

"Blame it (Remix)" Jamie Foxx Feat. Kris Allen??? Possibly?

Kris Allen got a ton of love from Jamie Foxx. Even said that he would cut a record with Kris if Idol doesn’t pan out. I wonder how many of these offers the mentors give actually get taken up. I have yet to hear Mariah Carey do a track with a former Idol. Or Dolly Parton do a song with Bucky Covington.

I gotta say…

the most surprising performance of the night was Danny Gokeys “Come Rain or Come Shine.” He sang with a swagger not seen the entire season. He stood on that Idol stage and said “I may have gotten here on the back of my wifes memory, but I stayed because of this voice!”

AWW… was that too soon???? I wasn’t the only one crying over his story back in the audition days! I was rooting for him to be good. But I also wanted his friend Jamar to make it. AND JAMAR should have made the TOP 12 easily!!! OH JAMAR, where art THOU!??

But I digress.

But I digress

Allison Iraheta was up to bat next, and she was stellar as always. Her performances have never been short of brilliant to me. Considering that she is 17 years old… BTW:

Popular Idol from an un-popular season.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALLISON! STILL JAILBAIT, BUT THATS ALRIGHT) The last girl this young to get his far won the whole thing…. Do we remember who??———————> That’s right. But will Allison be able to make it to the finale? If all the ladies rally around her and get their vote on… perhaps. No one in their right mind would disagree that she has an incredible voice, and she is a very marketable commodity in the pop music world of today. A latin Hannah Montana perhaps????

The boy has got vocals and style in spades

OH Matt Giraud. Wearing my favorite hats. He sang My Funny Valentine, and it was pretty damn good. But while I’m watching him (who is my favorite right now), I can’t help but wonder how Adam Lambert is going to trump this performance. And that’s the Lambert Effect (Which I will talk about in an upcoming blog!). Matt G does a very decent job of putting his stamp on MVF, but it still feels a bit karaoke. Which is why ultimately he will come up short in this competition.

Lastly, we have Adam Lamberts performance. OMG. This guy knows he’s going to win. He has got an attitude and swagger (twice in one blog. impressive) that no one else has.

As soon as I heard him say he was singing Feelin’ Good I thought about AJ Tabaldos brilliant performance….

THEN! I REMEMBERED ANOTHER PERFORMANCE… Leslie Hunt. OMG. Listen to the scat towards the end.

She obviously got eliminated, but watch this video of her performance on elimination night. Hilarious. Cut to about 2 minutes and 45 seconds into the video for the actual performance. She acknowledges her choice to scat. One of my favorite Idol moments of ALL time. Its worth watching the whole vid. I promise!!

Anywho back to Adam. Great performance, not his best. But it definitely cemented his status as the obvious front runner. Short of a upset not seen on Idol since the supposed Daughtry Debauchery (I was more upset that Elliott didn’t win that year, but I think we can all agree that Taylor did not deserve to win), I think Adam will walk away with this years crown.

So the end of the episode is here. And let’s see if I can name the songs

they sang without looking it up.

Kris Allen- The Way You Look Tonight
Allison Iraheta- Somebody Watch Over me (?)
Matt Giraud- My Funny Valentine
Danny Gokey- Come Rain or Come Shine
Adam Lambert- Feelin’ Good.

Not bad, Dave. Not Bad.

Not bad.

Who is going home, you ask???

hmm… I’m going to say that the person going home tonight…
The person with the least amount of votes…

The country has spoken and the person I believe to be going home will be….

Sad to see her go. But i'll see her on tour.

TIL NEXT TIME AMERICA!

Wow. It’s been awhile. Best Top 5 EVER??

For those who have been keeping up. It has been a couple weeks since we’ve added any posts to our Utterly Horrendous Blog. LIFE HAPPENS. What can we say?

YOUR TOP 5!

Oh Danny... You are soo boring now. But I stil love you!

The Most Consistent Idol this year

Is Idol his to lose?

Can the only female left be our next American Idol

The judges used the save on him. Could he win the whole thing?

This is by far the most wide open Top 5 that the show has ever had. I can’t think of previous Top 5 that comes close. I think right now it’s Adam Lamberts to lose, because of judges pimping and due to girls blind eye to his very real homosexuality. And more importantly, the kid has got pipes (And not just the ones he’s laying.)

Lets look at the very serious competitors.

Danny Gokey- The very early favorite, But he has been suffering from Archuleta Syndrome (A.S. is a disease that strikes many early front runners. Its stunts their growth as an artist throughout the competition. A.S. also causes the contestant to pick very boring and predictable Idol songs). But Danny has been fighting the A.S. and has not been in the bottom 3 the entire year. But the gas in his tank is running out as we get closer to the Finale. We’ll see if he can kick it into overdrive with some memorable performances. Can YOU name a Danny Gokey moment this year??

Matt Giraud- The Soul man this year. He is by far my favorite Idol to listen to in the car. His studio versions of songs are amazing. I don’t think his personality has shone through enough. Also, after every performance the judges feel compelled to mention Adam Lambert and Danny Gokey in Matt Girauds critiques, which is very unfair to him. His song choices have been a bit more adventurous than I would have liked, but at least he takes risks. He went a bit vanilla with Have You Ever Loved a Woman, but I still liked it. Matt is least likely to win, but in any other season, he would have at least placed 3rd.

Kris Allen- What a season this guy has had!? I still feel like this kid made a mistake by mentioning his wife early on. The girls swoon over this guy more than any other guy this year, and the wifey broke their hearts. His versions of songs are creative and very much his personality. My favorite so far has to be Ain’t No Sunshine. That was definitely his “Imagine” or his “Billy Jean” moment.
Allison Iraheta- The little 16 year old that could. This girl is probably the best female rock vocalist the show has ever had. She has hints of Christina Aguilera in her vocal performances. She is the only female left, and if she goes home it’ll be the first Top 4 Guys in IDOL HISTORY! So NO PRESSURE ALLISON! If women gather up and support her, she could definitely sneak into the finale.

Adam Lambert- Wow. This kid has pulled in some performances. People point to Tracks of My Tears has an Idol Moment. But I challenge  you to not be more impressed by his rendition of If I Can’t Have You as one of the greatest in Idol History. He has had more “moments” than anyone this season. But he is also the most polarizing Idol EVER. I have never seen more people hate or love a contestant as much as Adam.  Barring any upsets, he will definitely be in our Finale in May.

Lets take a look at Previous top 5′s and compare!

Season 7

1.David Cook
2.David Archuleta
3.Syesha Mercado
4.Jason Castro
5.Brooke White

At this point we knew it was David and David. No doubt in anyones mind.

You get two David Cook vids

Season 6
1.Jordin Sparks
2.Blake Lewis
3.Melinda Doolittle
4.Lakisha Jones
5.Chris Richardson

eh. I don’t think anyone cared enough this season about the top 5. They were all fairly mediocre. This was my favorite Jordin Performance.

Season 5
1.Taylor Hicks
2.Katharine McPhee
3.Elliott Yamin
4.Chris Daughtry
5.Paris Bennett

Taylor won!? Still the most WTF? Winner of American Idol. Elliott was my favorite and is still my favorite idol ever (tied with David Cook). My favorite performance.

Season 4
1.Carrie Underwood
2.Bo Bice
3.Vonzell Solomon
4.Anthony Federov
5.Scott Savol

Really? It was Carrie Underwood or bust. Bo Bice had a nice following, but he had no chance. Remember ALONE?? Nuff SAID

Season 3
1.Fantasia Barrino
2.Diana DeGarmo
3.Jasmine Trias
4.Latoya London
5.George Huff

I didn’t watch this season, but Youtube clips and just hearing about this season; sounds like it was Latoyas to lose and Jasmine had Hawaii to thank for 3rd place.

Season 2

1. Reuben Studdard
2. Clay Aiken
3. Kimberly Locke
4. Josh Gracin
5.Trenyce

I’m going to need Stephanie C to chime in on this season and season 1 because I didn’t follow the show too well back then. But it doesn’t seem like Josh Gracin ever had a chance of winning, neither did Kim or Trenyce.

This is the only song I think of when I hear about season 2.

Season 1

1. Kelly Clarkson
2. Justin Guarini
3. Nikki Mckibbin
4.Tamyra Gray
5. RJ Helton

I’m pretty sure it was Kellys to lose. Even though I love RJ Heltons performance of I’ll be there.